When the Mind Falls, the Body Soon Follows

The last week was a disaster. I attended work 2 days out of 5. And now, another absence. I don't really understand what's going on here. I feel like I'm a jinx. I attract the most unfortunate of events.

I try to be strong for my girl who is in a dire situation right now. Her dad has the right side of his body paralyzed. The blood clot on the left side of his brain w/c caused this has already been dissolved but seeing your old man like that  is a daunting task. you would wish to be in his place and take the hit for him. With this, they always have my prayers.

My girl has gone home to Butuan to be with her dad. Though I had to let her go, I even encouraged her to go, it ain't easy getting left behind. counting the days that gone by. With each day my longing grows. I thought she'd be back by now but it seems I would still have to wait a week or two.

At work, it's a dog eat dog atmosphere. There are only a few of us who don't really give a fuck what happens around but enough is enough. I have bled for these motherfuckers and what do I get? Nothin. When I "discover" something I could do to boost my stats legally, these shitheads  complain. when I do the assigned task to me and my stats hit rock bottom, not a single soul notices.

So here I am, lettin' it all out on a blog I haven't touched for a while. I was off from work again today. damn chest pains are killing me.

I do hope one day, I can read about success, of love of joy...coz today, this is just too damn dark.

The sickness, laziness, tired cocktail

Come to think of it, I have been working harder than I have ever in my career with my present employer. I have worked well out of my comfort zone, well out of my pay grade even. When I snooped around and asked if ever we would get "just" compensation for our efforts, the first reply was a big yes, a few Q&A's later, it is all a blur. Good for the "boss" that he got promoted, he himself told me I must do the task he gave me coz he should be doing it but don't know how to. (Aint that great?). Well he still got roughly 3 months to prove he is a man of his word. I have been consistently on top of my game, but I am payed less than my counterparts. I am not asking for a bonus, I am asking for just compensation. what's the use of hiring people and giving them better pay just looking at their resumes and seeing they have been long in that company? Length of service is not a LONE testament of skill. it is a criteria for loyalty and that is good if you are running a battalion of soldiers. But for a workforce? What good would it do? you're just cultivating an environment for mediocrity, laziness, incompetence and pure stupidity. Forgive my rudeness, but I am not being rude. This is blunt honesty.

I have bled crimson and blue for you, time for you guys to do your part.